Brats & Beer » NFL

I’m sure you’ve all heard by now about the misfortunes of former Vikings running back Onterrio Smith, but for those who have been out of the country let me briefly recap: The Whizzinator got himself suspended from the NFL for violations of the banned substances policy (he likes to smoke the ganja), so he joined the Winnipeg Blue Bombers of the CFL to try and resurrect his career, but this past weekend Smith was cut from the Bombers’ roster. It seems he reported to training camp with a foot injury which kept him out of practice and the first exhibition game, and then when he did get a chance to play, the former Viking only carried the ball for seven yards on two carries and lost a fumble. (Classic line from the ESPN story by Len Pasquarelli quoting Winnipeg general manager Brandan Taman: “Toronto’s suspended NFL guy [Ricky Williams] gets all the accolades, but our suspended NFL guy, despite all the baggage and the [injured] foot, is pretty darned good, too,” Taman said.)

It has been noted in several places that Smith’s options are pretty slim at this point, but here’s an idea that just might work: He should pull a Bosom Buddies and join the Women’s Professional Football League. The WPFL season doesn’t start until July 22, so there’s still time for Smith to get into camp and win a roster spot, he’d get to meet girls, and maybe he’d even be able to put up some decent stats in that league. Just trying to be helpful here.

family_feud-6302166 And the survey says, Brett Favre is still one of the most popular athletes in America. The Harris Poll released their survey of the top sports stars last week, and No. 4 came in third behind Tiger Woods and Michael Jordan. I came across this item while reading Deadspin over the weekend, but they seem rather dubious of the results of this poll in part because Favre was ranked so high. I’m not sure why it should be surprising, though, given that he’s been the third or fourth most popular sports figure for nearly a decade now. Sure, he had a bad season last year, and to be sure we all take issue with the amount of press coverage devoted to every sneeze and non sequitur, but as for the man what is there to not make him popular among the general public? He’s practically the face of the NFL these days, the last of an old guard still battling despite the odds.

Not that this poll doesn’t reveal some oddities of American society. Kobe Bryant is back in the top 10 after being left out last year. I guess you get a one-year suspension in popularity for (alleged) rape. Meanwhile, Barry Bonds cracks into the top 10 for the first time, which does make you wonder if this poll is measuring the famous or the infamous. And the poll does offer hard evidence, as if we needed hard evidence, of just how fickle fame can be: Falling out of the top 10 this year were Peyton Manning, Tom Brady, Donovan McNabb, and Ben Rothlisberger.

checking_attendance-5973149 Am I the only one who thinks the national press is paying an inordinate amount of attention to who is and who isn’t at Packers training camp this year? The AP, especially, has really stepped up its attendance checking duty in Green Bay, first sounding the alarm that Brett Favre is not in camp on Monday, then sounding surprised when he shows up on Tuesday. And each story carries the same tone of “Mike McCarthy has lost control of his troops” and “there’s a player rebellion going on.” Of course, they don’t come right out and say it, but that seems to be the implication we’re supposed to draw. Why are they out to scuttle McCarthy’s debut season before it even begins?

I did find the Press-Gazette’s report on Favre’s press conference pretty amusing, though, especially when he was talking about all the different terminology in this new offense and he said, “For example, we have a call ‘Pennsylvania,’ which means, well, I’m not quite sure what it means yet, but I completed it, so that’s a positive.” Classic.

burning_money-6498825 Matt Millen strikes another blow for effective management in the NFL. The Lions on Wednesday signed Ross Verba to a deal that will pay the former Packer defensive lineman $4 million to play this season. According to ESPN, the contract gives Verba a $2.2 million signing bonus and a base salary of $1.8 million, but the deal could be worth $20 million over five years if the team exercises an option next year. Four million bucks for a guy that didn’t play at all in 2003 due to an injury and sat out all of last year after the Browns released him? Apparently the Ford family is doing so well they have money to burn, and Millen is more than happy to oblige. I’d be willing to go fill a couple cans of gasoline and to help out. Burn, baby, burn.

It must be the dog days of the off season, because I’m thinking about punters. Specifically, I find myself rooting for Jon Ryan, the Canadian footballer Green Bay picked up in February to challenge BJ Sander. Ryan holds the CFL single-season record for punts with an average of 50.6 yards set last year. Of course, as Press-Gazette is quick to point out, Canadian league punters are coached to drive the ball for distance rather than kick for hang time, but maybe we can sign a couple track stars to play on the coverage team. Or maybe he’s really accurate and can nail those kicks into the corner. Just anything to get our dismal punting game out of the basement.

Ryan’s coming to the Packers also has a bizarre twist to it. Last year he played for the Winnipeg Blue Bombers (now the home of one Onterrio McWhizzinator), so when he left the CFL for the riches of American football, the Bombers signed Duncan O’Mahoney from the BC Lions as his replacement. Unfortunately, O’Mahoney never arrived at training camp over the weekend. Seems he decided to go on a walkabout or something instead of reporting to the team. The wayward punter has been located safe and sound, though the team is already looking for another new punter to replace their replacement.

joey_harrington-5280759 I really wanted to post something uproariously funny about the fact that the Lions traded quarterback Joey Harrington to Miami, but despite the collective wisdom of several lagers consumed this evening, all I can come up with are these salient points:

Matt Millen drafted Joey Harrington in the first round
Matt Millen traded Joey Harrington for a provisional sixth-round pick
All of this has something to do with Joey Harrington

I am a little disappointed that we won’t get to enjoy seeing AJ Hawk maul Joey H. several times this season, although it will still be pretty entertaining to see Jon Kitna, Cade McCown, or Shawn King (or whoever else walks in off the street to play QB for the Lions) get the business end of the Green Bay linebacker blitz.

Everyone, it seems is getting their due. Javon Walker, who was traded away to the Denver Broncos, finally got the “respect” (that’s what the kids are calling it these days) he’s been begging for: A five-year deal worth $40 million. Denver was smart, though, to add a clause to the contract that demands Walker be healthy in order to get his first big bonus check next March. (Oh, and as a parting shot, Walker set the record straight by saying that it wasn’t Brett Favre who soured him on Green Bay, it was Ted Thompson.)

Up in Green Bay, meanwhile, Donald Driver got a little “respect” of his own. The Packers agreed to give their one remaining tried-and-tested starting receiver a two-year contract extension worth about $4 million, even though Driver went on the record as saying he’s happy to be playing in Green Bay, he’s thrilled to be part of the team, he doesn’t want to be traded, and he would never hold out of training camp or anything to force the team to give him more money. How about that?

Missed this news in the run up to Packers minicamp, but Wisconsin fullback Matt Bernstein joined teammate Brian Calhoun in Detroit last week. Bernstein signed with the Lions as an undrafted free agent in time to join the team’s rookie minicamp over the weekend. No word on the Lion’s Web site on how well he did. Other Badgers signing with pro teams last week included center Donovan Raiola (Rams), DB Levonne Rowan (Eagles), LB Dontez Sanders (Browns), and OL Jason Palmero (Vikings). So, just for you out there keeping score, that makes nine UW players either drafted or signed to NFL teams, none playing in Green Bay.

More tidbits came out of the second day of minicamp in Green Bay, but the highlight was Brett Favre’s first press conference since deciding to return for his 16th season with the team. The half hour session with reporters can be summed up thusly:

I’ve decided to play, because I want to play, so I’m here to play, though I’m not sure how much longer I’ll play (about that I’m not going to say). I’m not really sure how well I’m going to play, or if I’ll want to play tomorrow or the next day, but if I am, I’m not going to change the way I play because that’s the way I play.

Got all that? I’m actually not going to try and parse it all, because it’s all beside the point anyway, but it was a strange, rambling monologue interspersed with moments of feisty defiance. He got especially worked up when someone asked about his comment to Chris Mortensen of ESPN that he wasn’t sure anymore he would want the ball in his hands in the final two minutes of a game. “I’m here,” he retorted quickly. “If I didn’t want the ball, believe me I wouldn’t be here.” Well, let’s hope so.

Other bits of news to come out of day two:

Mark Roman apparently asked for his release from the Packers after the team signed Marquand Manuel from the Seahawks. Seems he was put off by the “way it was handled,” like he was supposed to be consulted or something?
Donnell Washington showed up to camp a bit overweight and out of shape, according to the Press-Gazette, and has been held of practice. Let’s all remember that Mike Sherman traded away a fourth-round pick to move up in the draft to take Washington.
Charles Woodson wants to be number two, or at least he wants to wear No. 2. The newly signed free agent corner is petitioning the NFL to let him wear his old college jersey number because league rules say DBs must wear numbers in the 20s, 30s, or 40s.

Chris Havel in the Press-Gazzette also comments today on the new zone blocking scheme the Packers will be using this season under Jeff Jagodzinski. He says it looks like thing of beauty when executed well, but otherwise it resembles an “onside kick.”

Well, well, well, the first minicamp started yesterday, and look who was in town: Captain Favrelous himself. See, if the coaches ask him to come to minicamp, he shows up. He might not like it, because that lawn down in Mississippi probably needs mowing, but if someone says, “Brett, we think you should come up to minicamp, get to know the new members of the team, maybe run a couple plays,” then he’s perfectly willing to come. See how easy that is, Mike Sherman.

I think a perfect analogy for the Packers this season, and Favre in particular, is the movie Rocky III. Number Four is just like Rocky Balboa: He’s won the title, won all the accolades, gotten a little older, then someone comes along and knocks him down. So Mike McCarthy needs to be like Apollo Creed and sit him down and say, “You gotta get that look back, Rock. Eye of the tiger, man.” Except, he wouldn’t call him ‘Rock,’ he’d call him ‘Brett.’ And so they head off to Siberia or wherever and train hard until Rocky, or in this case Brett, finds the “Eye of the Tiger” again. And then that song by Survivor starts playing, and in this case it is Survivor playing the song because, well, who can replace Survivor?

The early reports from both the Press-Gazette and the Journal Sentinel were pretty upbeat and positive:

Al Harris, as expected, is pretty excited to be playing opposite Charles Woodson. “We’re going to be bad as (expletive),” he’s quoted as saying. “We’re going to get things done.”
“I’m only 22 and I have a chance to learn from two great players like Al and Charles,” Ahmad Carroll told reporters. “It’s a good move for this team.” At least he appears to have a healthy attitude.
“He’s a no-nonsense type of guy, a little different from Mike (Sherman). He’s stressing X’s and O’s. I kind of like it that way,” Bubba Franks summed up his impressions of McCarthy on the first day of practice.
The JS also reported that Favre and Aaron Rogers were chatting it up during breaks between plays, so that’s a positive step.
Donald Driver made it clear that he did not threaten to hold out or demand to be traded. “I’m not that type of guy,” he said. “I’m here, and I’m happy. I never said that.”